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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

‘Hookah….Harmless fun or Harmful Sin?’

hookah

Its evil has spread amongst us like wild fire.

From the West to the East, it is a slow poison that has permeated the societies, even among the Muslims.

In fact, it crept upon us so subtly that no one really thinks its bad. And it has blinded individuals who partake in this new fad to believe that it isn’t harmful.

What is this evil, this menace, this new fad that I am talking about?

It is the evil of smoking Hookah…..also called sheesha, nargeela, argila, ghalyan, as well as hubbly-bubbly.

Nowadays, hookah bars and cafes have popped up everywhere, fueled by the growing popularity of hookah smoking among teens and young adults.

It is a normal, everyday thing in some parts of the Middle East, when father and son, brother and uncle, all go out to smoke hookah while the ladies stay home. No hayaa, no respect, no sense of shame or guilt.

Hookah…evil ???

But I thought it was harmless…. .one might say.

Harmless ?

Lets see how “harmless” hookah is. Let the facts speak for themselves.

What science says about hookah?

Mayo Clinic research says: “Although many believe that the water in the hookah filters out all the “bad stuff” in the tobacco smoke, this isn’t true.

According to a recent World Health Organization (WHO) advisory, a typical one-hour session of hookah smoking exposes the user to 100 to 200 times the volume of smoke inhaled from a single cigarette.

Even after passing through the water, the tobacco smoke produced still contains high levels of toxic compounds, including carbon monoxide, heavy metals and cancer-causing chemicals (carcinogens) .

Hookah smoking also delivers significant levels of nicotine (about 70 times more )— the very addictive substance in tobacco.” (Pulmonologist Mayo Clinic Edward Rosenow, M.D., )

“One single session (45-minutes) of Hookah smoking will result in the smoker breathing in 100 times more smoke than regular smoking.” (World Health Organization)

“Contrary to what many beginning users may think, hookah tobacco use carries many of the same risks as cigarette smoking, including being linked to lung cancer and other lung diseases.” (John L. Kirkwood, President and CEO of the American Lung Association) .

“Links have been found between water-pipe (hookah) usage andoral, lung and bladder cancer, in addition to heart disease and clogged arteries,” (American Lung Association) .

“The water moisture induced by the hookah makes the smoke less irritating and may give a false sense of security and reduce concerns about true health effects.” (Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics)

“Water pipes (hookah) smokers were five times more likely than non-smokers to show signs of gum disease. People who smoked water pipes had five times the risk of lung cancer as non-smokers. ” (Journal of Periodontology)

The World Health Organization (WHO) regional office in Cairo estimates that 17 percent of

Tuberculosis cases in the eastern Mediterranean are attributable to the smoking of water pipes.

Na’uzubillah! Cancer of the mouth, lung and bladder…tuberculosis, heart disease, lung disease, gum disease….exposure to toxic compounds like heavy metals, nicotine, tar, arsenic….you name it.

Is there any more evidence one needs to know that smoking hookah is bad for you? !!!

What our Shariah says about Hookah?

1. It’s harmful to yourself:

All these harmful materials collect in the person’s body over time, resulting in a gradual killing of the organs and tissues. These diseases may not appear all at once, but the one who smokes is most likely to suffer from some of them, and his suffering increases as he grows older.

And anything that cause harm to one’s body or to others is haram in Islam.

Allah says: “Do not kill yourself. Allah is Merciful unto you.” (Surat al-Nisa :29)

29. Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo la ta/kuloo amwalakum baynakum bialbatili illa an takoona tijaratan AAan taradin minkum wala taqtuloo anfusakum inna Allaha kana bikum raheeman

29. O ye who believe! Eat not up your property among yourselves in vanities: But let there be amongst you Traffic and trade by mutual good-will: Nor kill (or destroy) yourselves: for verily God hath been to you Most Merciful!

“…make not your own hands contribute to your destruction. ..” (Surah al-Baqarah:195)

195. Waanfiqoo fee sabeeli Allahi wala tulqoo bi-aydeekum ila alttahlukati waahsinoo inna Allaha yuhibbu almuhsineena

195. And spend of your substance in the cause of God, and make not your own hands contribute to (your) destruction; but do good; for God loveth those who do good.

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) said: “There should be neither harming nor reciprocating harm.” (Ahmed, Ibn Majah-saheeh by Albaani)

2. It is a poison:

Don’t you see that it is a kind of slow poison with which a person kills himself?

The statistics show that over 3 million people worldwide die from smoking-related causes each year.

“Whomsoever consumes poison, thereby killing himself, then he will be consuming his poison forever in the fire of Hell and he will abide in it permanently and eternally.” (Bukhaari, Muslim)

It is suicide:

Knowing fully well the harmful effects of hookah, if someone still smokes it, it is suicide.

“Whoever kills himself with something in this world will be punished with it on the Day of Resurrection.” (Bukhaari, Muslim)

It is a waste of money and extravagance:

Extravagance in Islam means spending on something haram.

The money that one spends on hookah is therefore an extravagance.

“… and do not be extravagant wasters. Those who are extravagant are kinsmen of Satan.” (Surat al-Israil 17:26-27)

26. Waati tha alqurba haqqahu waalmiskeena waibna alssabeeli wala tubaththir tabtheeran

26. And render to the kindred their due rights, as (also) to those in want, and to the wayfarer: But squander not (your wealth) in the manner of a spendthrift.


27. Inna almubaththireena kanoo ikhwana alshshayateeni wakana alshshaytanu lirabbihi kafooran

27. Verily spendthrifts are brothers of the Evil Ones; and the Evil One is to his Lord (himself) ungrateful.

You will have to answer to Allaah for this:

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) said:

Your body and life have a right over you:

Allah Subhaanahu wa Taala has given you this life and this body as an Amanah to you. You are supposed to take care of it and protect it from harm and haram.

What will you say to Allah when He asks you about it?

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam)said: “Your body has a right on you.”

27. WaAllahu yureedu an yatooba AAalaykum wayureedu allatheena yattabiAAoona alshshahawati an tameeloo maylan AAatheeman

27. God doth wish to Turn to you, but the wish of those who follow their lusts is that ye should turn away (from Him),- far, far away.

“Allaah wants to let you into His Mercy, whereas those who follow the desires want you to drift far away (from the right path).” (Surah an-Nisaa:27)

Don’t smoke it and don’t let people smoke it:

It is not only haram for someone to smoke hookah himself, rather it is equally haram to offer it to people, to sell it, buy it, or promote it in any way.

“Help you one another in Al­-Birr and At­-Taqwa (virtue, righteousness and piety); but do not help one another in sin and transgression. And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is Severe in punishment.” (Surah Maidah:2)

Do not even sit with those who smoke, even if you don’t smoke yourself:

And if you keep company with those who do smoke, even if you yourself don’t, or even sit with the people who are smoking it, then you are still counted amongst them.

Allah warns us;
“And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Quran) that when you hear the Verses of Allah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be one of them. Surely, Allah will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell” [al-Nisaa 4:140]

We need to realize that smoking is haram, whether it is hookah, cigarettes or anything else. It is bad, not just for ones health, but also for other worldly matters and much worse for the Akhirah.

It is our duty to educate ourselves, our kids, family, friends and communities about this evil, and teach everyone to stay away from it and to help those addicted to it to get help.

May Allah guide us and enable us to stay on the right path and do only those acts that are pleasing to Him. Ameen.

by Asma bint Shameem.

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Make peace…..its one of the noblest things

more important than prayer,fasting



We decided to meet for lunch. We were all excited. After all, we were getting together after a long time. As we sat at our table, we started talking, catching up on all that had happened in the past few years, when I noticed a bit of tension developing between two of my friends. Then, all of a sudden, right before my very eyes, before I knew it, it blew up into a horrible argument. Angry words flew between the two of them and before I could do anything to stop it, both my friends stormed out of the place, vowing to never talk to each other ever again!

“Subhaan Allaah! ….what just happened here?” I said to myself, trying to digest the horrible incidence that just took place. Two of my dear friends fighting with each other!

Many of us face something similar several times in our lives……our families and loved ones arguing over something so trivial, our friends not talking to each other over the littlest of things, people shunning each other and staying angry, even years after the matter took place, to the extent that sometimes they don’t even remember why they are fighting!

And we all know people who may not be openly fighting and arguing, yet we know that there is definitely some kind of either hostility or jealousy between them, or even some kind of misunderstanding amongst themselves.
So what’s a Muslim to do in such a situation? Stand by and watch?!!
Definitely NOT.

What is required from us in such a situation is that we make peace between them for the sake of Allaah.

“The believers are nothing but brothers, so make peace between your two brothers and beware of Allah that perhaps you may be shown mercy.” (Al-Hujaraat:10)

And, noble, indeed is the act of making peace and reconciling between two arguing parties. In fact,  it is superior to voluntary fasting and sunnah and nafl prayer.

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:

“Shall I not tell you of something that is better than fasting, prayer and charity?” They said: Yes. He said: “Reconciling between two people, for the corruption of that which is between the hearts is the shaver (destroyer). It is the shaver, and I do not say that it shaves hair, rather that it shaves religious commitment.”
(al-Tirmidhi- hasan)

Subhaan Allaah! Better than fasting, prayer and charity! That just goes to show you how important it is for us to reconcile between people.

In fact, it is so important that, although lying is haraam in and of itself, yet, Allaah has permitted even lying in order to reconcile between people and to remove discord and conflict. This is because of the great negative consequences conflicts and arguments have, on the religious commitment of individuals as well as communities.

Umm Kalthoom said that she heard the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) say: “He is not a liar who reconciles between people, conveying good messages and saying good things.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

She also said: “I did not hear him (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) grant any concession concerning anything that the people say of lies except in three cases: reconciling between people, war, and what a man says to his wife, or a woman says to her husband. (Muslim)

Reconciling between disputing parties is a means of earning great rewards. Allaah says:
“There is no good in much of their private conversation except for someone who enjoins giving of charity, good deeds generally or making good that which is between people. Whoever does that seeking the pleasure of Allah, We will give him a great reward.” (An-Nisaa: 114)

However, while making peace between disputing parties, do remember that Islam has a particular methodology and approach to this issue. It is not a matter of simple “conflict resolution”. We cannot simply negotiate and compromise until we reach something agreeable to both of them because it may very well be unjust or not in accordance to Islaam. As Muslims, we add Allah into the equation.

Instead of evaluating the two positions in relation to each other, we have to examine each of them in relation to what pleases Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta’ala. For, it is quite possible for two Muslims to be in dispute with each other and yet, neither of their positions be acceptable according to Sharee’ah – even if the other side were to accept it. So when two Muslims or two groups of Muslims disagree or fight, it is upon us to call all of them to what Allaah says in that matter. Allah said:

“If two groups of believers get into a fight then make good that which is between them. Then, if one side transgresses against the other, fight the transgressors until they return to the order of Allah. If they so return, then make good that which is between them with justice and be equitable. Surely, Allah loves those who are equitable.”  (Al-Hujaraat:9)

So, if you know anybody out there, arguing, not talking to one another, shunning each other, or simply having distrust and ill feeling towards some other fellow Muslims, go ahead and make peace between them. Do it for the sake of Allaah, remembering the reward and asking Him to accept it from you. Not only will it bring you immense reward and forgiveness from Him, but it will be one of the noblest things that you would do.

Ali ibn Abi Talib said: “One of the things which brings forgiveness is making your fellow Muslim happy.”


Anas said: “Whoever made peace between two, Allah gives him for every word the [reward of] freeing a slave.”

Abu Umama said: “Walk a mile to visit a sick person and walk two miles to visit your brother for the sake of Allah and walk three miles to make peace between two.”

Remind yourself and them that a Muslim should avoid division and difference completely. Avoidance, hatred, rejection and envy all destroy the Muslim community and render it vulnerable to all forms of fitna. If, however, someone does get into such situations of dispute, then they have a maximum of three days after which they should solve the dispute and end the bad feeling between them.

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said: “Do not boycott one another, do not turn away from one another, do not hate one another and do not envy one another. Be slaves of Allah, brothers. And it is not allowed for a Muslim to avoid another for more than three days.”  (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

And: “Whoever forsakes his brother for a year, it is as if he has shed his blood.”  (Abu Dawood- saheeh by al-Albaani)

May Allaah remove all forms of enmity and ill feelings amongst us and enable us to love each other for His sake Alone. Ameen..

by Asma bint Shameem

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji’un

To Allah we belong, and to him is our return
Holy Qur’an – Al- Baqarah 2:156

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Yeah, sure we say this statement when someone dies. Also some of us may say this sentence when they lose something, suffer a setback or harm.

But………..do you know what it means?

Sure, everyone know that it obviously means ‘To Allaah we belong and to Him is our return.’
But that’s not what I am talking about.

I mean ….do you REALLY, TRULY understand these words and their implications in a Muslim’s life?

It means …whatever we have is not really ours. It belongs to Allaah.

Take a look around you; everything you see, all that you have and all that there is….in you, on you, around you….belongs to Allaah, alone.
It is Allah Who has given you all the property and goods you possess, and that He is the true Owner of them all.

So the cars that you own, the houses that you live in, the businesses you possess all truly belong to Allaah
The kids that He blessed you with, the health that He gave you, the time that He has allowed you are all Allah’s property.
Even the bodies we live in and the life that we have belongs to Allaah alone.

“And to Allah belongs the inheritance of the heavens and the earth….” (Surah Aal-Imraan:180)

“The kingdom of the heavens and the earth and everything in them belongs to Allah. He has power over all things.” (Surat al-Ma’ida: 120)

“Say: ‘To Allah belongs the East and the West…” (Surah al-Baqarah:142)

Now, since everything belongs to Allaah, then we have to include even our souls in that list. The very souls that we think of as our “self”; our “nafs”; our “being” — whatever you want to call it — that very thing that distinguishes you from the rest of the world, belongs to Allaah. It’s not YOURS.

In fact, YOU are not YOURS.

You belong to Allaah.

And this is the essence of the concept of slavery to Allaah in Islam.

And since He is the true Possessor of everything, and everything is His property, He allots what He wills to whomever He wills…….and then He takes it away. After all, it was Allaah’s to begin with.

So He may give you some thing and then take it back after a while.

He will bless you with a precious child that you love dearly…and then He may take it away.
He will grant you money, honour and status….and then He may take it away.
He will give you youth, vitality and health and then surely He will take it away.

In fact everything you have will only be with you for a very short while.

And then the Owner will claim His Right.

So when Allaah does reclaim what was rightfully His, WHY MOURN OUR LOSSES?

Just like a friend who lends you his book. And then after a few days, he wants it back and you give it back to him…no regrets…..no sorrow….no questions asked.

Similarly, if Allah takes back some of His blessings upon you for some reason….so be it.
Say Alhamdulillaah.

Don’t grieve. Be patient. Submit to the will of Allaah, being pleased with His decision for you. For surely He will only do what is best for you.
Just think…..The Owner came and took it back.

Remember….that you’re not the real owner…..you were NEVER the real owner to begin with. You only had everything because it was Allah who gave it to you in the first place. If He didn’t give it to you, you wouldn’t have had it in any way…in fact, you couldn’t  have had it.

Remember….man enters into this world empty handed…and leaves it empty handed.

Remember….that everything we have, all the blessings we enjoy, are gifts from Almighty Allah…gifts that we enjoy for a limited period until He takes them away whenever He deems fit.
They are a trust from Allah…a loan to you…to see how you respond to these gifts from Allaah and how you use them….in the obedience of the Almighty, thanking Him and worshipping Him……OR……..to the disobedience to the One Who gave then to you in the first place.

Take note of the words of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) on the occasion of the death of his son, Ibraahim:
‘Our eyes are filled with tears, our hearts with grief, but we say nothing with our lips except that which pleases Allah…. Verily, to Allah we belong, and to Him we return.’ (Bukhaari)

And we all know the famous incidence about the companion Abu Talha and his wife when one of the sons died and Abu Talha was not at home. She washed and shrouded him and when Abu Talha came home and asked about his son, she said, “The child is quiet and I hope he is in peace….” (Bukhaari)
Subhaan Allaah….such patience!
And such Imaan in the statement “Inna lillaahi wa inna ilayhi Raaji’oon”!

She truly understood its meaning and the affect it should have on her life as a Muslimah, submitting to him and being pleased with whatever He has decreed for her.
She knew that whatever she has, is not truly hers. Rather, it is Allaah’s….and He took back whatever He owns at its appointed time.
And it is because of this Imaan so strong, this understanding, that the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) made dua for them and Allaah blessed them immensely.
“’They (i.e. Abu Talha and his wife) had nine sons and all of them became reciters of the Quran (by heart).”  (Bukhaari)

“Be sure we will test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives, but give glad tidings to those who are steadfast, who say when afflicted with calamity: ‘To Allah we belong and to him is our return.’ They are those on who (descend) blessings from Allah and mercy and they are the once that receive guidance.”  (al-Baqarah:155)

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The Prophet (PBUH) said “Pass on knowledge from me even if it is only one verse”

By Asma bint Shameem


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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Men get Hoor Al’Een in Jannah But what do woman get??!!

Written By Asma Binte Shameem, Edited by PrinXess *IM*

Most of the time, sisters and even Non muslim females do ask: Men get Hoor Al’Een in Jannah….But what about us women…….what do we get??!!

My dear sisters…..first of all Jannah and Jahannum (and Hoor Al’Een, for that matter) and all what happens in them are matters of the Hereafter. These are a part of the realm of the Unseen of which we have very limited perception. Such matters are beyond our understanding and cannot be known by reasoning and thinking and we have really no knowledge of these things except what the Quraan and the authentic Sunnah tell us.
All we do is to believe in such matters of the Unseen, while remembering that its realities are known only to Allaah.

And actually, one should not really get into the details or indulge in discussions of the matters of the unseen without knowledge, because there is really no benefit in that. Rather if such a question comes up, we should say Allaah knows best.
As Allaah says:

“And follow not (i.e., say not, or do not, or witness not) that of which you have no knowledge. Verily, the hearing, and the sight, and the heart of each of those ones will be questioned (by Allaah)” (Surah al-Isra’ :36)

And, dear sister, from whatever limited knowledge we do have about Jannah that Allaah and His Messenger (sal Allaahu Alayhi wa Sallam) have informed us, there are a few points that we, as believing women, should remember, when questions such as these pop up in our heads.

1. Allaah is Most-Just and the Most-Merciful


The first and foremost thing to remember is that this is Allaah, Rab ul Aalameen we are talking about here.
Subhaan Allaah.

Remember that He is ar-Rahmaan ar-Raheem, the One who is Just and there is no one more just than Him…. And He is the One who is Fair and there is no one who is more fair than Him!!

He will never ever let you down or be unfair to you. If He has promised the men of Jannah Hoor Al’Een, then surely He will give the believing women of Jannah something equally pleasing too. There is no way that He will favor the men over the women, aoodhu billaah. Subhaanahu wa Ta’ala.

“If any do deeds of righteousness, be they male or female, and have faith, they will enter Jannah, and not the least injustice will be done to them.”  (Surah an-Nisa:124)

2. Allaah created men and women differently

Another thing to remember is that what pleases women may be different from what pleases men. And everybody knows that. So wouldn’t He, Who created us in the first place know that better than anybody else?

“Shall He who has created (all things) not know? He is the Subtle, the Aware.” (Surah Mulk: 14)

So have this firm belief  in Him, and have blind trust in Him, Subhaanahu Wa Ta’ala….He, who knows us women and our nature best and He, who will give the women of Jannah whatever will please her the best.

“Therein you shall have (all) that your inner-selves desire” (Surah Fussilat:31-32)

Woman are strong temptation for man, than a man for woman

Who is going to disagree with the fact that man are more inclined toward woman, more attracted toward feminine beauty, and have more attraction to lust and hunger for sex – if we use plain words. It is just natural what Allah created, even the scientific facts prove this. The basic body desires are just Natural, on which no one is to be blamed,

The Prophet (sall-Allaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

“Watch out for this worldly life (safeguard yourself from its temptation) guard yourself from the allurement of women. Verily, the first trial for the people of Israel was caused by women.” (Reported by Muslim)

He also said: “After me I have not left any affliction more harmful to men than women.” [As men are tempted most by woman than any other worldly material which lead them to ultimate fitnah]

“O young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes from casting (evil glances) and protects the private parts from adultery; but those who cannot should keep on fasting for it is a means of controlling sexual desire.” [Agreed upon]

Yet Islam says men to control them selves and ordered them strictly to lower their gaze and guard their private parts, Those who obey the Lord will definitely got to heaven InshaAllah, and may get hoor al-ayen in reward of their patience and steadfastness in this world inshaAllah. 

Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is All-Aware of what they do. [An-Noor 24:30]

“Such is the Paradise which We shall give as an inheritance to those of Our slaves who have been Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)”[Maryam 19:63]

“But as for him who feared standing before his Lord, and restrained himself from impure evil desires and lusts. Verily, Paradise will be his abode” [al-Naaz’i’aat 79:40-41]

4. In Jannah the righteous woman will be married to her husband and she will be pleased with that

Allaah will marry the believing women to their husbands of the dunya if they were righteous and make them pleased with that. That IS what they would desire. They wouldn’t want any one else.
And if a woman did not get married during her worldly life, or if her husband was not from the people of Jannah, then Allaah will marry her to one of the believing men in Jannah. The women will live with their husbands and children and families in their own realms in Paradise, and they will be so content with that.

“Gardens of perpetual bliss: they shall enter there, as well as the righteous among their fathers, their spouses, and their offspring.” (Surah ar-Ra`d: 23)

“Enter the Garden, you and your wives, you will be made glad. There will be brought round for them trays of gold and goblets, and therein is all that the souls desire and eyes find sweet and you will stay there forever. This is the garden, which you are made to inherit because of what you used to do. Therein for you is fruit in plenty whence to eat.” (Az-Zukhruf 43: 70-73)

Ibn Katheer said: “ they (the women of Jannah) lower their gaze and avoid looking at men other than their husbands, so they do not think that there is anything in Paradise that is more handsome than their husbands. This was stated by Ibn ‘Abbaas, Qataadah, ‘Ata’ al-Khuraasaani and Ibn Zayd. And it was narrated that one of them will say to her husband: By Allaah I do not think that there is anything in Paradise finer than you, or that there is anything in Paradise dearer to me than you; praise be to Allaah Who has made you for me and made me for you.” (Tafseer al-Qur’aan al-‘Azeem).

5. In Jannah there will be no jealousy

Remember,my sister, that life in Jannah will be nothing like life here in this world. It is a different world that has nothing in common with this world except names only; the realities of things are completely different.
Pleasures and feelings that we experience here in this life will be experienced in a different and much better and purer way. We will eat and drink but there will be no filth or dirt. Our bodies will not excrete wastes nor will we grow old. And not only our physical bodies, but our psychology and nature will be different also.

“And We shall remove from their chest any (mutual) hatred or sense of injury….” (Surah al-A’raaf:43)

The Prophet (sal Allaahu Alayhi wa Sallam) said:

“The first group to enter Paradise will look like the moon when it is full. They will not spit or blow their noses or defecate therein. Their vessels and combs will be of gold and silver, their incense burners will be of aloeswood and their sweat will be musk. Each of them will have two wives, the marrow of whose calves will be visible from beneath the flesh because of their beauty. There will be no dissent or enmity among them and their hearts will be as one, and they will glorify Allaah morning and evening.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

He also said: “they will not envy one another.”  (Bukhaari)

So even if the men will have Hoor Al’Een, we will not be jealous. Yes, it seems hard at this time, but it is just as hard to imagine eating and drinking without any excretion, although it is surely true. So rest assured…there will be love and peace and no jealousy.

Besides, think about it….Isn’t the One capable of making you the way you are in this world with all your jealousy and the other ‘womanly’ feelings, capable of making you without jealousy in the Hereafter??!! Of course He is!

6. Men have to strive hard in deen for Jannah, while For woman Allah made so many easy rewards:

What else u need sister when Allah subhana wa’tala made jannah easier for you

The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The woman who dies in pregnancy or childbirth is a martyr.” Narrated by Abu Dawood, 3111; classed as saheeh by al-Nawawi in Sharh Muslim, 13/62. And he said: the one who dies in childbirth, i.e., she dies with something (the child) inside, not separated from her. 

He also said, Woman giving Birth to many child will be rewarded more. 

Hadith no: 595 Narrated / Authority Of: Aisha (the mother of the faithful believers) I said, “O Allah’s Apostle! We consider Jihad as the best deed.” The Prophet said, “The best Jihad (for women) is Hajj Mabrur.”Rejoice, O sister, the believing women will be better than the Hoor Al’Een

Read the quote below, my sister, and rejoice!

“The situation of the believing woman in Jannah will be better than the situation of the hoor al-‘iyn; she will be higher in status and more beautiful. Several ahaadeeth and reports have been narrated concerning that, but none of them can be proven to be sound. But, if a righteous woman from among the people of this world enters Paradise, then she will do so as a reward for her righteous deeds and as a honor from Allaah to her for her religious commitment and righteousness. As for the hoori who is one of the delights of Paradise, she has only been created in Paradise for the sake of someone else, and has been made the reward for the believing man for his righteous deeds. There is a great difference between one who enters Paradise as a reward for her righteous deeds and the one who was created as a reward for one who did righteous deeds. The former is a queen and a princess, and the latter, no matter how beautiful she is, is undoubtedly lower in status than a queen, and she is subject to the command of her believing master for whom Allaah created her as a reward.” 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen said regarding this matter:
“It seems to me that the women of this world will be better than the hoor al-‘iyn, even in outward appearance, and Allaah knows best.” (Fataawa Noor ‘ala al-Darb).

Logically speaking……Wouldn’t you rather be beautiful??

When we look at ourselves and our nature, we realize Allaah’s infinite Wisdom and Justice in the way He has created us. It is in our very nature that most of us women are generally pleased with and devoted to only one man.
Ask yourself this or any woman out there you know, this question and you would know what I mean. Ask them….

“What would you rather be……be extremely beautiful with one loving husband or be ordinary looking with several husbands??!!

I am sure there will not be very many women out there who would pick the second choice…!!!

We have no right to question to Allaah

Actually, if you think about it, we have no right to question Allaah in whatever He does, how He does it and when He does it. We should not question Allaah’s wisdom in making us in the nature we are now or in re-creating us in the nature we will have in the future. We know that He is generous and merciful, and we have to trust Him.
He is All-Wise, All-Knowing. He is the Just and He knows Best.

AND, for arguments sake, EVEN IF, in His Infinite Wisdom, Allaah chooses to give men Hoor Al’Een and the women absolutely nothing, so be it. Know firmly, in your heart and believe unshakably in your mind, that, this is what was better for you. Know that He will NEVER be unfair to you and He will give you ONLY and ONLY if He pleases. And He will withhold from you, ONLY and ONLY if you deserve it.

Where is our trust in the Almighty??

The real focus

Instead of worrying about what Allaah has promised men and competing with them, we should focus on how to serve Him and worship Him better. We should try to improve our relationship with Him so that we may hope for His generous reward and forgiveness, so that out of His Mercy, He may enter us in Jannah.

Think about it, sister, if we learn all the details of what life in Jannah will be like and what rewards women will get, but fail to worship and serve Him the way He and His Messenger have taught us to…. then our knowledge is pretty useless, isn’t it…?

If you are among those women who leave this world having won the pleasure of Allaah, then good news to you, my sister. When you enter Jannah you will have delights and pleasures such as no eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind has ever imagined. You will have all that you wish for in the best of ways. You will be more beautiful than you can ever imagine, with a status higher than you can ever conceive and happier than you have ever been, content with your husband and family. Everything that you will ask for will be granted, and everything that you long for, you will get. You will never find anything to upset or disturb you, or make you jealous for you will be in the care of the Most Generous, Most Merciful.
What more could you ask for….????

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Favoritism Among Children….An Injustice Indeed


My brother is the only one in the house who gets any attention. He always gets everything he wants!” My Dad prefers our oldest sister to the rest of us. He always praises her, and no matter what good we do, he never appreciates it!

This is a common problem that we see today. And that is the problem of favoritism among children.

Parents may show their favoritism for many reasons. Favoritism could be shown to the oldest or the youngest. It could be a preference of a son over a daughter or the preference of a child more beautiful than the other or simply for no apparent reason at all.

Favoritism comes in many ways. It could be in the form of showing more affection to a child, or excessive praise of one to the neglect of others, giving gifts to one child only or giving better, more expensive gifts to one child in preference to others. It can even be favoritism by simply ignoring one child as compared to the others.

Islam condemns all kinds of biases and injustices and indeed, favoritism is a kind of injustice. A person is not being just if he shows favoritism.

Verily, Allah enjoins justice, and doing good, and giving (help) to kith and kin. (Qur’an, Surah an-Nahl:90)

Justice must be maintained in everything, even in how often we look at or speak to each of our children. The following Hadith shows us how important it is to avoid favoritism when dealing with our kids.

Nu’maan ibn Basheer said:

“My father gave me a gift of some of his wealth, but my mother, ‘Amrah bint Rawaahah, said, ‘I will not approve of it until you ask the Messenger of Allah (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) to bear witness to it.’ So my father went to the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) to ask him to bear witness to the gift. The Messenger of Allah (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said to him, ‘Have you done the same for all of your children?’ He said, ‘No.’ He said, ‘Fear Allah and treat your children justly.’ So my father came back and took back that gift.” (Bukhari, Muslim)

In fact, it is one of the rights of our children that we treat them equally. The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:

Your children have the right of receiving equal treatment, as you have the right that they should honor you. (Abu Dawoud)

And he (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) also said:

Do justice among your sons (kids), and repeated it thrice. (Muslim)

Why is it wrong??

Showing favoritism is wrong no matter how you look at it. It is injustice to the child who is being neglected, it is injustice to the one who is being preferred over the other and it is even injustice to the parent showing the favoritism in the first place.

Showing preferential treatment to one child over the other siblings nurtures a kind of jealousy and even hatred in the heart of the one being neglected. And as the experts tell us, this may lead to various psychological and social problems that can last well into adolescence and adulthood. While the one who is always preferred and praised over the other may think he/she is somehow superior or better than others and lead him/her to being arrogant and spoiled. And surely that is not fulfilling our responsibility in raising our children in accordance with the way Islam requires us to raise and educate our kids.

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:

There is no person to whom Allah has given responsibility and dies neglecting that responsibility, but Allah will deny him Paradise . (Muslim)

The parent who is showing this favoritism is not being just to himself either since he is supposed to be fair to all his children and is answerable to Allah as to how he treated his family. By showing favoritism, he/she is being sinful and not fulfilling his/her duty as a parent according to the teachings of Islam.

The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:

Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock…..A man is the shepherd of the members of his household and is responsible for them. A woman is the shepherd of her husband’s house and children and is responsible for them……Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. (Bukhari, Muslim)

Are you one of them?

Many mothers and fathers who show preferential treatment to some of their children do so without realizing it. They do so unconsciously and if asked about preferring one child over the other, they will immediately deny it. However, since it is a matter about which one will have to answer to Allah one day, each of us parent has to sincerely look deep into our soul to see if we are guilty of this injustice.

O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones… (Qur’an, Surah al-Tahreem:6)

Therefore, the Muslim parent is the one who fears Allah in his dealings with his children, one who is just in his speech and judgments. His sayings, actions and dealings with his children are based upon justice with no degree of discrimination or preference.

The just will be with Allah on thrones of light ….those who are just in their rulings and are fair with their families and those of whom they are in charge.(Muslim)

How to Avoid Showing Favoritism Among Children

Favoritism in the family is a big concern. When a certain sibling is singled out as a favorite. This can cause resentment and feeling of rejection, among the other siblings. Sometimes you may have shown favoritism, without even recognizing it. Outlined in my article, you will find, the types of favoritism and how to avoid them.

Instructions

Things You will Need:

  • Accepting that you are wrong.
  • Willingness to stop favoritism.

1      Favoritism:

Showing favoritism, to one child over the other, can leave your child feeling neglected and unwanted. Show equal attention to each sibling. It may be hard, if a child is unruly, but most times the child is just crying out for more attention.

2      Buying gifts for one and not the other:

This may sound trivial, but in the mind of a child it is not. A child can grow up resenting his parents for showing his sibling preference over him. Indulge the other sibling in the joy of receiving a gift.

3      Spoken words:

Be careful of the words that you say to your child. Certain words can leave your child feeling worthless and can even lead to suicidal thoughts. Remember that once a word is left from your lips, there is no way that you can take it back.

4      Achievements:

If your child achieved something, give him the praises that he deserves. Children are sensitive, he will notice, if you are giving all the praises to his sibling.

5      Comparison:

Comparing your child to his sibling, can cause a buildup of resentment. It also can cause low self-esteem issues further, in life. Every child is born with his own personality and traits, accept him for who he is.

6      Scolding:

Avoid sparing one child from a scolding, while giving the other a scolding. This would not be fair to your child. Everyone should be scolded fairly.

7      Raising your children in a home free of favoritism, is best for the whole family.

A home with a loving environment, and free of favoritism, will produce adults with less psychological issues.

Tips & Warnings

  • Show your children equal love, in the home.
  • Giving one child his favorite treat and denying the other child can leave your child feeling, less special. Share equally.
  • Don’t spend more time with one child and less with the other.
  • Avoid showing constant admiration for only one child.
By Asma bint Shameem

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Taking The Husband’s Name After Marriage – Not

Based on Shareeah


In our eagerness to copy the West, we Muslims have adopted many of their practices which have no basis in the Sharee’ah. And among them is the practice of a woman changing her family name to that of her husband after she gets married.

The fact is that Islam does not require woman to change her name at marriage and there is nothing in the Sunnah to indicate that a woman should take her husband’s name after she gets married.

Actually, the Ulama tell us that this is an innovated practice that is not approved of in Islaam.

Now, I know some people will say…“ Oh, come on…What is the big deal?!!”

So read on and you will know what I mean….

The wives of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) are the Mothers of the Believers, and the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam), is the noblest of people and the best example. And yet when we look at their example, we will realize that when the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) married any of his wives, NOT ONE of them took his name. On the contrary, each one of them kept her father’s name even if her father was a kaafir. Similarly, the wives of the Sahaabah and those who came after them did not change their names.

Did you ever think why they didn’t do that?

Surely, if it was a good thing, the wives of the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) would have done it and the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) would himself have instructed it and encouraged them to do it.

That is because it is Allaah’s order to keep your father’s name as an indication of your lineage.

“Call them (adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allaah…” [al-Ahzaab 33:5].

And the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said: “Whoever calls himself by other than his father’s name, will be cursed by Allaah, the angels and all the people.” (Ibn Maajah -Saheeh by al-Albaani).

And he (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) also said:

“Whoever knowingly claims to belong to anyone other than his father, Paradise will be denied him.” (Ahmad, al-Bukhaari, Muslim).

Now some might argue….“But the woman is not claiming that her father is someone else. She is just honoring her husband or she doesn’t mean it that way. She just wants to belong to her husband out of love for him.”
To those people I say….

If it was a matter of honor to have the husbands name attached to the wife’s, wouldn’t our Ummahaat have done that??

Isn’t it the biggest honor in the WORLD to have the name of the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) attached to yours?? And yet the wives of the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) didn’t do that.

Ever wonder why??

And if it was a matter of expressing love for the husband, no relationship between a husband and wife on the face of this earth was better than the relationship between the Prophet(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) and his wives. And yet none of the Mothers of the Believers expressed their love for the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) by changing their last names.

It doesn’t make any sense

The last name is an indication of the father of the person and represents the person’s lineage.

Shaykh Bakr Abu Zayd said: “This is one of the beauties of Sharee’ah, because calling a person by his father’s name is more appropriate for knowing who is who and telling people apart…..” (Tasmiyat al-Mawlood, 30, 31).

Originally, the woman is ‘the Daughter of So and so’, and NOT ‘the wife of So and so’. Since there is no blood relationship between the husband and wife, how can she take his last name as if she is part of the same lineage?

And surely, she is not claiming that he is her father!!!!

Also what happens if she gets divorced, or her husband dies, and she marries another man? Will she keep changing her surname every time she marries another man?

In addition to this, there are rulings attached to the woman being named after her father, which have to do with her inheritance, spending and who is her mahram, etc. Taking her husband’s last name overlooks all that.

Also, if you think about it, the husband is named after his own father, and what does she have to do with the lineage of her husband’s father? This goes against common sense and true facts.

Besides, the husband has nothing that makes him better than his wife’s father. So why should she give up her father’s name and  take her husband’s last name??

And why does the man get to keep his father’s name and not the woman??!!
It just doesn’t make any sense.

Sheikh Salih Al-Munajjid says:

“A woman changing her family name to that of her husband after she gets married is Haraam and is not allowed in Sharee’ah, because it is not permissible for anyone to claim to belong to anyone other than his or her father…… And Allaah knows best.”

Not only is it so in this world,  but, we will also be called by our father‘s name in the Hereafter as well. The Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:

“On the Day of Resurrection, each betrayer will have a banner raised beside him, and it will be said, this is the betrayer of So and so, the son of So and so.” (Bukhaari, Muslim).

So, all you single females out there, don’t be in such a hurry to change your maiden name after you get married. And those of you who have already done that, it is never too late. Take back your maiden name and reclaim your identity. It is part of the Sharee’ah.

By Asma bint Shameem


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