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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

8 ways of finding the right person to marry

Marriage is never an easy thing. We think of it as this amazing romantic bliss that we will somehow attain one day.

Sisters dream of marrying that amazing brother who has the character of the Messenger of Allaah (sallAllaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), the Eemaan of Aboo Bakr, the courage of Hamzah, the wealth of ‘AbdiRahmaan bin ‘Awf but the fact still remains, everyone wants to marry that one truly amazing person and it is not much different for guys.

We wish to bump into a Hoor al-‘Een that has lost her way from Jannah. I mean why wouldn’t that ever happen? It won’t happen, because you are daydreaming bro that’s why.

Now wake up and listen to this short lesson in some important “Do’s and Dont’s” along with other useful information inshaaAllaah.

#8 AVOID FACEBOOK SPOUSES

And any other social network for that matter

Since we spend most of our time online these days, it is very easy to try to fulfil all our needs online, even the need of finding a soul mate. Now don’t get me wrong, there are marriages who actually do work out, and I am not by any means hating on brothers and sisters who made it work (whatever floats your boats akhis and ukthis, just keep it halaal), but let’s face it, the Internet is a very weird place.

Everyone always tries to seem holier than they really are, even a Kaafir could pretend to be Muslim scholar for all you know.  In the good old days people married other people who they actually knew, and life was much more smooth, in very broad terms.

But today you marry someone who comes across as religious online only to find out on your wedding night he isn’t really that strict on Salah, oh and did I mention he has tons of friends who just happen to be girls? And not to mention he smokes (sorry forgot to tell you that too, my bad) the point is, be very careful concerning ANY online proposals.

If the person is serious and a good guy, drop them your wali’s number and don’t communicate with them anymore, then you’ll know if the person is really a gentleman or not.

#7 BEFRIEND GOOD PEOPLE

Looks more and more promising

This will open up the door for networking later on, because one of the main problems today is that a lot of people ask, ‘OK but how do I meet good potential spouses?’ and they often say ‘I don’t know anyone!’ but in reality everyone knows SOMEBODY.

Be it that friend who you only seem to meet at the masjid for big events, or your cousin who you don’t spend much time with, there is always someone you can befriend. But keep in mind that these individuals should be good practising people themselves because then they can help introduce you to other practising people who in turn might have brothers and sisters who are looking for marriage.

Trust me, it works. Try it for yourselves and see, but just don’t become that one sister (or brother) who ALWAYS talks about marriage and the opposite gender, because chances are you might get labelled as “thirsty” if not worse.

And if that fails, there is always facebook.

#6 BE AT GOOD PLACES

Do not confuse booty call material for wifey material

In the same way that you won’t find your amazing virgin niqabi wife at the club, dancing late into the night. You, yourself need to be looking in the right places, and this sort of brings us back to the previous point.

Attend lectures, study circles or maybe even volunteer to help at the masjid etc, all these activities will open up the door for you to meet the right people and once you get to know them you can raise the issue of marriage discreetly.

Remember most people who marry will tell you they got to know their spouse either through family and friends, or they might have actually met whilst doing the same activities, so try to be more active and don’t just sit at home feeling sorry for yourself. Oh and also stop going to the club.

DISCLAIMER: This website does not endorse any talking between the genders without the supervision of a Wali. Be a man and step up your game if you truly love her. Otherwise go to facebook.

#5 BE REALISTIC

Sometimes your knight in shining armour is just a miskeen dude in tin foil

Chances are, you’re not going to bump into Shaikh Sudais’s son, let alone the Shaikh himself, and even if you did, I highly doubt any of them would ask you for marriage (more like ‘SECURITY!’) So try to keep your hopes realistic, yes we all want to marry a Haafidh, we all want a sister who knows all about pleasing a husband but never had a boyfriend before. We all want a brother who is super pious with super long beard (the longer the beard the bigger the Taqwa right?) who also owns a house and has a car, plus he should be really knowledgeable too, like bin baaz knowledgeable, preferably not blind though, oh and a six pack wouldn’t harm either.

But we often forget, that when you marry someone, they still have their whole life ahead of them. Most of the wives of the major scholars married these amazing men whilst they still were ‘nobodies’ and similarly you teach your wife (with gentleness) how to be romantic and it is all a journey. If you think that you will marry that one complete person who has everything, you will never marry and that’s the harsh truth.

You will end up on facebook surfing from one profile to the other.

#4 INVOLVE YOUR PARENTS

I mean at least this brother has his own house, so that’s always a plus right?

Most people don’t like doing this, for whatever reason. Most girls are just simply too shy to bring marriages up to their parents, in case the parents look at them as “horny” or a victim of teenage hormones. Others are afraid that if they involve the parents they will feel pressured into marrying someone they don’t want to marry, only to please their parents.

You remember that one time your friend mentioned to HER parents that she wanted to get married? And for her parents to help her look for a decent brother? And how they totally misunderstood her and now you heard that your friend moved back to Bangladesh and has 7 kids at the age of 21? Yeah that’s totally not going to happen to you.

Now what I am suggesting is a middle path. Bring the topic up to your parents, or if you’re too shy, speak to your brother or someone else who can raise the issue with your parents. And then ask your parents to look around for you, remember they can only suggest but the final decision still lies with you. And most of us really don’t make use of this option, which is very sad.

Our parents are the only human beings alive on the face of this earth who would do anything and everything for us, so why not consult them?

#3 ARE YOU REALLY READY FOR MARRIAGE?

Believe it or not brothers, marriage is more than just mating and lying in bed. Shocking I know!

I don’t mean to scare you away by raising this question, as Muslims we should always aim to get married since it is the Sunnah of our beloved Prophet.

But sometimes, some people rush into marriage. They think just because they are physically ready (have urges etc) that they should get married, forgetting that even the Prophet actually mentioned that those who have the MEANS to get married should do so. Now having the means is not just having a mature body, or even loads of cash. Rather it also about being mentally stable and able to cope with the hardships of marriage.

Don’t worry though, in marriage all you need is love to make things work (like they always say right?) so no need to over think things, love conquers all! Except that’s a total lie, marriage needs so much more, and even though love is a key element in marriage it is not always what keeps a marriage going.

Remember marriage is not all sunshine and fun, sometimes you will argue sometimes you wont love each other as much, what will happen then? Will you ask for a divorce just because the marriage isn’t fun anymore?

What if there are children involved, then what? The point is, prepare yourself for marriage mentally. Read up on the rights of the Husband and the rights of the Wife, don’t just marry because you’re 20 and feel you have to. This husband will be either your Jannah or Hell, do you really know what that means?

Similarly this wife and future children will be your responsibility as a husband, Allaah will ask you about them and everything they do, so be prepared.

#2 WOULD YOU MARRY YOURSELF?

Because that is how I roll

‘Ofcourse I would, I am pure awesomeness, I am the very defin…’ if that is your answer then I can tell you right now that you don’t really have the right mentality for marriage. We often get blinded by the search for the ultimate partner that we neglect to look at ourselves.

We cry and say why won’t anyone marry me? But do nothing to change ourselves. How do you treat people when you get upset? What do you do if you hold a grudge? Do not turn a blind eye to all these important issues, rather tackle them one by one. No one is perfect but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be trying.

If you truly and sincerely work on your own flaws, and really do become more caring and loving then you will notice how people will look at you differently. People will start to think of you as ‘wifey’ material because you are good with kids, because you care for others, because you forgive people and don’t hold grudges don’t gossip etc the list is long but if you take one step at a time you will be married before you know it.

Well you would know of it, ’cause I mean you couldn’t get married without knowing about it, right? So technically you would know about it, but yeah whatever.

#1 DU’AA

Dua is the weapon of the believer, why not use it?

Because like anything in life, Allaah is the true reason behind things. Even though some people often roll their eyes and think ‘Yeah right the old, make dua brother/sister’ but if you truly have faith in Allaah and know that He answers the prayers of those in need, you will never get tired of making du’aa to Him.

Take the story of Muusa alyhi salaam as an example, in Soorah Qasas we are told about how he left Fir’awn and was literally fleeing for his life, his one concern was saving his own skin. But what happened? He made du’aa to Allaah, and Allaah not only saved him but blessed him with a wonderful wife. So in short, if you make du’aa and don’t give up Allaah will help you, and that is a promise!

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Falling in Love Allowed in Islam

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Muslim women Paying fine for wearing niqab in France

Keep Going sisters , We r indeed proud of all of you… you are doing Jihad .Our Duas and Prayers are with all of you!

May Allah give you success .

ameen

This is really strange ,i mean  half naked woman , or even full naked woman running on beaches are not the problem,but Naqab is…What you think ? share ur views in cmnts !

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Sharia: A Practical Guide

Commonly asked questions regarding Sharia and Islam

How did Sharia start?

What, nowadays, is the authoritative source of Sharia?

What are the basic principles of Sharia?

Adultery
Murder
Zinah (sexual offences)
Is Sharia the same in all countries?
Individual rights vs needs of society?
Does Sharia make life easier or harder for the ordinary Muslim?
Why has Sharia become a synonym for cruelty and lack of compassion?
Sharia and dress
Forced and arranged marriages
Men having many wives?
Is it easier for men to divorce?
Sharia and food
The Prophet’s wife Aishah

In countries where Sharia law is enforced, how are specific punishments decided on and who makes these decisions?

Would many Muslims in Britain be in favour of Sharia law being implemented here?

What areas of law do Muslims in Britain think are mishandled by British state law?

How did Sharia start?

The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) laid down the laws – some of them were direct commands stated in the revelation of the Qur’an; other laws grew up based on the Prophet’s own example and the various rulings he gave to cases that occurred during his lifetime. These secondary laws are based on what’s called the Sunnah – the Prophet’s words, example, and way of life.

So, all the laws of Sharia are based primarily on Qur’an and then on Sunnah, and after that, if there was no information in those two sources, judges were free to use their intelligence to make analogies. As in most legal systems, cases could then be referred to by later judges.

What, nowadays, is the authoritative source of Sharia?

Just the same as outlined above. What is important, however, is that judges are highly educated in Islamic law and jurisprudence, and this is an area where some damage was done during the colonial periods when Islamic schools of law were closed down with a great loss of knowledge and expertise which is only now being repaired slowly. The problem is that it is all too easy for an individual judge to make some pronouncement or invoke some penalty without full knowledge of the background of Sharia and the spirit behind the various laws and penalties.

What are the basic principles of Sharia?

These are to see the will of God done on earth as it is in Heaven (as in the Christian Lord’s Prayer). How can we possibly know this will? By study of the revealed scriptures and by choosing talented, intelligent and far-sighted merciful people of excellent character as our judges. The whole principle of God’s will is to bring about compassion, kindness, generosity, justice, fair play, tolerance, and care in general, as opposed to tyranny, cruelty, selfishness, exploitation etc. All the rules of Sharia are towards those ends.

The usual criticisms of Sharia – that it is so cruel as regards execution, flogging and cutting off hands, totally ignore all the extenuating circumstances that would lead to these penalties not being applied – they are known as hadd penalties (pl. hudud), the hadd being the extreme limit of the penalty. Thus, if a person was sentenced to having a hand cut off, he or she should not be sent to prison and/or be fined as well. People who regard these practices as cruel will never be persuaded otherwise, so Muslims usually leave that aside.

Their point is that the cutting of the hand for theft is a very powerful deterrent – Muslims care less for the callous and continual thief than they do for the poor souls who are mugged and robbed and hurt by the thieves. The Middle East is certainly not full of one-handed people – as any traveler would tell you. What we have lost here is the horror of dishonor that true Muslims still have.

They would do anything rather than offend Allah, and they of course believe that Allah sees every single thing that is done – there are no secrets. Even if you get away with something on earth, it has been seen and recorded and you will have to face judgment for it eventually, and the people hurt by your action will be recompensed. Of course, if you do not believe in God, or a judgment, or a life to come, the whole system is quite meaningless to you. In Sharia law, if a thief could prove that he/she only stole because of need, then the Muslim society would be held at fault and made to supply that need, and there would be no hand-cutting. Most thieves would think twice before risking a hand on mugging an old lady for her handbag!

In the UK, we live in a society where anything not fixed down that you take your eyes off for a second would risk being stolen – in Muslim society this is not the case. Nobody wants to have a thief in their family, village, street or society. They despise thieves, and of course, they also despise rapists, murderers, and adulterers.

Adultery

In the west, adultery has become so commonplace because of sexual freedoms – all the emphasis these days seems to be on finding sexual satisfaction; in Muslim societies, there is far less emphasis on sex – it is usually regarded as a weakness that can lead to all sorts of trouble. Family is far more important; the notion of a million unborn children per year being aborted, and single mothers, is abhorrent in Islam.

Murder

Sharia law for murder allows the death penalty, but is kinder than western law in one respect – after judicial judgement has been made, appeals are then allowed to the family of the murdered victims, and they are begged to be merciful. In Islam, it is always regarded as the height of mercy to forgive a murderer, even though one may have the right to take his/her life in reprisal.

The form of execution is not specified in Islam – i.e. it is not usually a stoning. Beheading used to be regarded as the quickest and most merciful way (as in Roman law, and the French guillotine); these days other methods may find approval. There are apparently far less executions in most Muslim countries than in the USA, for example.

The penalty for adultery is open to debate. Most scholars will insist that the penalty as laid down in the Qur’an was 100 lashes, and there were various rules for regulating how lashes were to be given too. Other scholars maintain that the old penalty for adultery as laid down by the previous prophets was stoning (as in the Old Testament). By New Testament times, the prophet Jesus had the famous case where a guilty woman was forgiven and sent away, told only to sin no more.

In some Muslim societies, judges and populaces might stone out of mistaken belief that this was what Islam required. In fact, Islam made it virtually impossible – to be sentenced to death for adultery, the couple had to be actually witnessed performing the physical act by four people who were in a position to identify both parties without doubt; this virtually ruled out the penalty, since adultery is taken for granted as a secret act and something not done in public.

Zinah (sexual offences)

There is some confusion over the meaning of the word zinah – this means a sexual offence, ANY sexual offence, and includes not only adultery but also sex before marriage and rape. In rape cases, the witnesses are no longer relied on since forensic evidence and scientific analysis can usually nail the offender. There is no suggestion whatsoever, anywhere, in Islam for a death sentence being required for sex before marriage.

Sometimes family members can become very shocked and upset about the behaviour of those in their families that they feel have brought shame upon them and may take matters in their own hands. We hear of girls being shot by fathers and brothers because of the shame. Sometimes these girls had not even had sex at all, but had just been chatting to males, or behaving in what is regarded as a shameful manner.

Many Muslim societies take a fairly lenient view of fathers thus killing their daughters, in a similar way to the old UK society taking a more lenient view of ‘crimes of passion’. However, it is still murder, and not something allowed in Islam, and Sharia judges would be obliged to bring the murderers to judgment. Whether such a father would get two year’s probation or be sentenced to death for murder would depend on the court judge, and would be subject to all the usual appeal procedures.

Is Sharia the same in all countries?

I’m afraid I do not know the answer to this, but certainly the principles are exactly the same in whatever country they are applied.

Individual rights vs needs of society?

Basically in Islam the needs of society always come first, with the proviso that injustices should always be able to be taken to judges who are not corrupt. The old Arab system allowed any person, no matter how humble, to take his/her case to the highest in the land personally. Islam brings a very strong sense of justice, and care of the oppressed and exploited.

Does Sharia make life easier or harder for the ordinary Muslim?

Much easier for those who strive to live the correct life pleasing to God and in kindness and peace with the neighbor; much harder for the one who is selfish, callous, cruel, exploitative, dishonest etc. There is virtually no sympathy for such people – unless they really are mentally ill, in which case they are not regarded as culpable in Sharia. All those before the age of puberty, or not of sound mind, are not regarded as culpable.

Why has Sharia become a synonym for cruelty and lack of compassion?

I think through two things – ignorance of the reality of Sharia law, and much publicized cases where Muslims in positions of authority have been very poor Muslims, if not non-Muslims in Muslim disguise. For example, 100 years ago we had stories of awful Turkish sultans, and people being rushed to blocks to have their hands cut off etc.

The media picks out certain cases and blows them up to make a big drama of them – they might pick on one particular murderer on death row in the USA and rouse everyone’s feelings, but totally ignore all the others due to be executed that day! A case like the Nigerian woman in danger of being stoned for adultery is a case in point. She might have been stoned by irate villagers, but on being taken into custody and judged by Sharia law she gets the opportunity to appeal and explain etc.

In her case, if it is true that she was raped, she most certainly would not be sentenced to death. What interests me is who were the rotten people who brought the case against her anyway?

Incidentally the correct Islamic method of stoning according to Sharia was similar to that advised by the Pharisees at the time of Jesus – the person was held fast in a fixed position, and a stone or rock that it took two men to lift (i.e. was heavier than one man could lift alone) was to be dropped to crush the head – it was not someone tied to a post and rocks hurled at them, although this has been done in some cultures.

The point was that if someone really had to be executed, it was to be done swiftly, with as little torture as possible, and usually publicly so that no vindictive person could do further nasty things behind the scenes and get away with it.

Sharia should promote gender equality. In fact, the natural Islamic tendency is to always consider women as the weaker sex in need of care and protection, and come down hard on the men who allow their womenfolk to get into difficulties.

Dress

Sharia does not require women to wear a burqa. There are all sorts of items of dress which are worn by Muslim women, and these vary all over the world. Burqas belong to particular areas of the world, where they are considered normal dress. In other parts of the world the dress is totally different. The rule of dress for women is modesty, the word hijab implies ‘covered’.

Some Muslim women feel that they should cover everything from neck to ankle, and neck to wrist. Others also include a head veil (this is the most controversial bit, and millions of Muslim women choose to wear it, or alternatively choose not to wear it – and there is much disagreement between the types!), and finally some choose to cover even their faces, although there is no Islamic text requiring this extreme. My own preference is a long black dress and a white headscarf – I have never worn a burqa in my life. Incidentally, when men try to enforce Muslim dress on women, this is forbidden – no aspect of our faith is to be done by coercion. It is up to the woman what she chooses to do – some choose full hijab and their men hate it!

Forced and arranged marriages

In Sharia Law any marriage that is forced or false in any way is null and void. It is not a proper marriage. This is a problem that seems to plague Muslim women from India/Pakistan/Bangladesh and nowhere else in the Islamic world – and it also applies to Hindus and some Sikhs from those areas too.

Forced marriage is totally forbidden in Islam. False marriage is too – for example, some of our teenage girls are sent back to Pakistan for a holiday when they are about 15, and sign things they do not understand, and then find out later that they have been ‘married’ even if it has not been consummated. UK lawyers are getting far better at studying Sharia these days, in order to protect these girls from this particular culture.

Forced marriage is not at all the same thing as arranged marriage. Muslims from many countries have a system of arranged marriages, in which the spouses may not have seen each other before marriage, but it always has to be with their free consent. The Prophet himself advised prospective spouses to at least ‘look’ at each other, until they could see what it was that made them wish to marry that person as opposed to any other.

Women forced into marriage, or seeking divorce for general reasons, have the same sort of grounds in Sharia as in the west – cruelty, mental cruelty, adultery, abandonment, etc. They may even request a divorce for no specific reason whatever, so long as they agree to pay back the mahr (marriage payment) made to them by their husband if the husband does not wish to let them go but are obliged to.

Men having many wives?

Men and women can have as many spouses as they can fit into a lifetime; but this is not generally approved. Women are requested to have only one husband at a time (there is evidence that wealthy Arab women were polyandrous before the coming of Islam – certainly wealthy men were polygynous), and men are limited to four at one time, whereas previously there had been no limit, and a wealthy and generous man was expected to cater for as many women as he could afford (in the absence of a welfare state).

Allah sent the proviso that no Muslim was ever to deliberately cause hurt or harm to another Muslim, so a man might not take extra womenfolk into his home if it would cause upset and distress (it was recommended when there were lots of widows after warfare, if the women were willing to be generous to bereft ‘sisters’).

Also, if a man could not provide equal treatment of his wives – equal food, clothing, money, living quarters, time spent with – he was refused permission for polygamy. Equal sexual activity was not ruled on, however. Some wives had no sexual relationship with their husbands at all after a while, or if they came into the household as widows of relatives. Don’t forget that most widows also came with their children. When the Prophet married the widow Sawdah he took on six of her children, and with Umm Salamah another four, for example.

Is it easier for men to divorce?

Yes, to a certain extent – but because of various cultural reasons. Most Muslim women until very recently in the UK would have found it hard to live after divorcing a husband, because they did not own property, had no jobs to support themselves or were burdened with young children. The same is often true in many societies to this day where it is not the norm for women to go out to work.

In Sharia, the custody of the children would normally go to the mother, but the father would have to pay for their upkeep. If the woman remarried, the children might well go to their own father – all this puts a woman off divorce, because of financial circumstances.

Regarding grounds for divorce, they are virtually the same as in the west, including incompatibility, and living apart for a length of time. The caliphs (successors of The Prophet Muhammad) ruled that couples should not be separate for more than 4 months without permission, and if they were it was grounds for divorce. If the woman wanted divorce but the man did not, she could approach a religious judge and be granted divorce so long as she repaid the husband’s mahr. Some women only ask very little, a few pounds; others put a price of thousands of pounds on themselves. The Indian subcontinent seems to abuse this too – since some husbands do not seem to pay it at all, and others even expect the bride to pay money to the bridegroom or his father!! The very opposite of Sharia law.

Sharia and food

The rules are those of haram (banned) and halal (allowed). All vegetable, fruit, grain and seafood is halal. Meat is halal providing it has been killed in the kindest possible way by a sharp instrument that pierces and kills swiftly (sharp knife, bullet, sword), and the appropriate prayers are said at its death (or at the time of eating if one is not certain).

Muslims may not eat any food that has been sacrificed to idols (e.g. Hindu meat), but kosher is fine. They may not eat any pork product or flesh with blood undrained from it; the most extreme Muslims will not touch anything that has animal fat included – even a biscuit – in case it is pork lard or gelatin from an animal not killed in the halal manner. If Muslims eat haram food without realizing it is haram (i.e. some butchers ‘fake’ their halal tickets), they are not held to blame, but judged by their intention. In cases of necessity, Muslims may eat anything available, even pork, rather than suffer hardship. Alcohol is haram.

The Prophet’s wife Aishah

No-one is absolutely certain of her age when she married the Prophet, but it could have been as young as 6; some scholars believe she was ten years older. However, the majority go for the age of 6.

The marriage that took place then was an agreement on paper, there was no physical relationship until Aishah reached puberty – but this in itself could have been at around 9 or 10 years old. That is not an unusual age for menstruation to start in hot climates, and once a girl is capable of producing a child she is regarded as technically a woman.

Sex for children under 16 is forbidden by law in the UK at the moment, but this has not always been the case and it is nonsense to suppose that there is no sexual activity amongst children under 16 in this country. No-one is able to stop them and if the girls get pregnant they frequently have abortions.

In Muslim countries it is considered far better to get youngsters married as soon as they show inclinations to have sex – then they can have it honourably, as much as they like, and the children born are not bastards. Many Muslim countries in fact do try to keep to the age of about 16 for marriage (as is the legal age in the UK), and prefer not to marry off their girls too young. Some societies expect marriages to be life-partnerships, but in others divorces are frequent if things do not work out and girls choose other husbands.

In the Prophet’s day, the normal age for boys to marry was about 15 and girls between 13-15, although some girls preferred to defer the role until their twenties if they had their own money. Don’t forget, there was virtually no contraception and marriage implied having a baby every two years or so.

The used to feed babies as long as possible to avoid too frequent pregnancy. As far as I know, the Virgin Mary was around 12-13 when she had baby Jesus, and she was living with her husband in one of these non-physical arrangements. The Prophet was certainly not a pedophile! He did not marry his first wife until she was 40, and he had no other wife until she died at the age of 65; then his second wife was in her 40s, to help him out while he was a single parent!

In countries where Sharia law is enforced, how are specific punishments decided on and who makes these decisions?

The specific punishments are decided on by the lawyers of the land, many of whom have been educated and trained in the west!

Would many Muslims in Britain be in favour of Sharia law being implemented here?

I think many Muslims in the UK would be in favour of Sharia law being implemented here, but true Sharia law is only really possible in a Muslim society, not in a non-Muslim or mixed society. Flogging for public drunkenness, for example, might make some of our louts and cruel men folk think twice before acting as they do, and thinking nothing of it.

I once left my expensive camera on a wall in Egypt and it was gone when I returned for it – no big surprise. What was a surprise is that someone in that village found out where my coach had gone next and took the trouble to travel nearly 100 miles to find me and return the camera – they had picked it up for safe-keeping and did not want any of their summer tourists (it is hard for Egypt to get tourists in August!) to think there was a thief in their village! I was also very impressed by the way people just left shop tills and went off to mid-day prayers, trusting that no-one would steal their money or stock.

I don’t think lawyers in the UK would ever bring back the death sentence, but many people here think that they should. Personally, I could never bring a case against a man seeking his death for adultery, and I would not be willing to put even the worst of criminals to death myself.

I feel the electric chair is far more barbaric than stoning. Incidentally the correct Islamic method of stoning according to Sharia was similar to that advised by the Pharisees at the time of Jesus – the person was held fast in a fixed position, and a stone or rock that it took two men to lift (i.e. was heavier than one man could lift alone) was to be dropped to crush the head – it was not someone tied to a post and rocks hurled at them, although this has been done in some cultures.

The point was that if someone really had to be executed, it was to be done swiftly, with as little torture as possible, and usually publicly so that no vindictive person could do further nasty things behind the scenes and get away with it. People gathering at executions were often those who had come to pray for and support the person being executed and not just ghoulish onlookers. I would feel just the same about witnessing such an execution as I felt about hanging when it was done here. I prayed all night before the execution of Ruth Ellis, the last woman to be hung in the UK.

What areas of law do Muslims in Britain think are mishandled by British state law?

I think Muslims generally are shocked by the general lack of respect and discipline here, especially if they are immigrants and not born here. They are particularly shocked by lack of discipline in schools and the difficulties faced by so many teachers in getting children to behave in class and actually learn.

They are shocked by the appalling rates of theft, drunkenness, drug addiction, sex outside marriage, abortions, rape of children and old ladies, homosexuality – especially when it is being put forward as quite normal and an acceptable alternative sexual lifestyle; homosexuals in positions of authority (from teachers to MPs).

They are also shocked by the general lack of respect for those in authority, and older people in general. In Muslim homes, children would probably be expected not to smoke in front of parents, not to sit down or start eating before them. They are terrified of their girls being chatted up, taken advantage of and made pregnant by British boys and men, who seem to be uncontrollably predatory and often drunk.

by Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Why do we pray five times each day?

I read in the Qur’aan that a man should pray three times:  before sunrise, after sunset and in the middle of the day. So why do we pray five times? I hope that you will not give me the story that 50,000 prayers were enjoined then it was reduced to five. I want a convincing answer.
Praise be to Allaah.
1 –  What is mentioned in the question about the number of prayers is mistaken.

It was 50 then it was altered to 5 prayers, a favor from the Lord of the Worlds to the Muslims.
2 –  The rules of sharee’ah may be divided into two categories:

Those which may be understood on a rational basis; and those which are purely worship, the wisdom behind which is concealed from us and is not mentioned in either the Qur’aan or the Sunnah.

Examples of the first include:  the prohibition on alcohol and gambling.

Allaah has told us the reason why they are forbidden, which is:

“Shaytaan (Satan) wants only to excite enmity and hatred between you with intoxicants (alcoholic drinks) and gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of Allaah and from As-Salaah (the prayer). So, will you not then abstain?”  [al-Maa'idah 5:91]

And there are other similar rulings.

Examples of the second kind include offering Zuhr prayer when the sun has passed its zenith, circumambulating the Ka’bah with it on one’s left (i.e., anticlockwise), the nisaab of gold being a quarter of ten percent;  Maghrib prayer being three rak’ahs, and many other such rulings.

What is mentioned in the question falls into this second category, which is things for which we do not know the reason from the Qur’aan or Sunnah, so we have to submit to the command of Allaah. This applies to all such rulings.

The Muslim has to accept the things for which Allaah has not explained the reason, and say as the believers say:  “We hear and we obey.”  He should not be like the Children of Israel who said:  “We hear but we disobey.”

Accepting what Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):  “He [Allaah] cannot be questioned as to what He does, while they will be questioned” [al-Anbiya’ 21:23] is better for the believer in his religious and worldly affairs, for he is a slave who has a Lord, and the slave has no right to ask his Lord why He enjoined something.  Rather he has to submit to His command. If he tells us why, we should do it, and if He does not tell us why, we should still do it.
3 –  In al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah al-Kuwaitiyyah (1/49-51) there is a useful discussion which we will quote here:

With regard to understanding the reasons why things have been prescribed, we may divide the issues of fiqh into two categories:

1 –  Rulings whose wisdom may be understood on a rational basis, either because the reason is stated in the texts, or because it is easy to work out.

Such rulings are the majority of those that Allaah has prescribed, such as enjoining prayer, zakaah, fasting and Hajj in general, and such as enjoining the mahr (dowry) in marriage, ‘iddah (waiting period) following divorce or widowhood, spending on one’s wife, children and relatives, divorce when married life becomes unbearable, and many other such issues of fiqh.

2 –  Ruling which are enjoined on us as a kind of pure worship.

These are rulings in which the connection between the ruling and the action is not clear, such as the number of prayers, the number of rak’ahs and most of the actions of Hajj.

By the mercy of Allaah, such rulings are few in relation to the rulings the wisdom behind which may be rationally understood. These rulings are prescribed as a test to demonstrate whether a person is a true believer.  It should also be noted that sharee’ah – both general principles and minor details – does not prescribe anything that contradict common sense, but it may prescribe something the reason for which cannot be understood.

There is a big difference between the two.  If a person is rationally convinced that Allaah exists and that He is wise, and that He alone deserves to be acknowledged as Lord, and he is rationally convinced that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is a true Prophet, then he affirms that Allaah is the Sovereign and the Lord, and that he is His slave. Then if he is commanded to do something or is forbidden to do something, and he then says,  “I will not follow this ruling until I know the reason behind this command or prohibition,”  then he has proven himself to be false in his claim to be a believer in Allaah and His Messenger.   The human mind has a limit beyond which it cannot go.

The one who rebels against the rulings of Allaah that have to do with rituals is like a sick person who goes to a trustworthy doctor who prescribes various kinds of medicine for him, some to be taken before eating, some to be taken during the meal and some to be taken afterwards, in various amounts, and he says to the doctor:  I will not take your medicine until you explain to me the reason why this one should be taken before eating and this one afterwards, and this one during the meal, and why are they are varying amounts, some small and some big? Does this patient really trust his doctor?

The same may be said of a person who claims to believe in Allaah and His Messenger, then he rebels against the rulings the wisdom behind which he does not understand. The true believer, if he is commanded to something or forbidden to do something, says, “I hear and I obey,”  especially when we have explained that there are no rulings that can be rejected on the basis of reason.

Not knowing something does not indicate that it is not true.  How many rulings are there, the reason for which has been concealed from us in the past, then we discovered that there is great wisdom behind them?

The reason why pork is forbidden was unknown to many people, then we found out that it carries germs and disease and other bad things, and Allaah wanted to protect the Muslim society against them. The same may be said concerning the command to wash vessels that have been licked by a dog seven times, one of which should be with earth… and other rulings the wisdom behind which may be discovered one day even though it is hidden from us now.

And Allaah knows best.
Source: Islam Q&A

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Conclusion

I want to Repent but …

O slave of Allaah, Allaah has opened the gate of repentance for you, so why not enter it? It was reported that repentance has a gate whose width is like the distance between East and West [according to another report: its width is like the distance travelled in seventy years]. It will not be closed until the sun rises from the West. (Reported by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer; see Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2177).

Listen to the call of Allaah: “O My slaves, you err night and day, but I forgive all sins, so ask Me for forgiveness and I will forgive you.” (Reported by Muslim). So why not seek forgiveness?

Allaah stretches forth His hand at night to forgive those who have done wrong during the day, and He stretches forth His hand by day to forgive those who have done wrong during the night. Allaah loves our apologies and pleas, so why not turn to Him?

How beautiful to Allaah are the words of the one who repents: “O Allaah, I ask You by Your power and by my own shame to have mercy on me. I ask You by Your strength and my own weakness, by Your self-sufficiency and my own dependence. To You I submit my lying, sinful forelock. You have many slaves besides me, but I have no Master except You. I have no refuge or escape from You except with You. I beseech you in the manner of a poor and destitute man, I pray to you with the prayer of one who is humble, I call upon you with the supplication of one who is blind and afraid. This is a plea from one whose head is humbled before You, whose nose is in the dust, whose eyes are filled with tears and whose heart has submitted to You.”

It was reported that one of the righteous people was passing through the street when he saw an open door out of which came a boy who was crying and weeping, followed by his mother who was pushing him out. She shut the door in his face, and went back inside. The boy went a short distance away, and stood there, thinking, but he could find no other refuge than the house from which he had been expelled and no one else who would care for him as his mother would. Broken hearted, he went back, and found the door still locked. So he lay down on the doorstep and went to sleep, with the tear marks still streaking his face. A little while later, his mother came out. When she saw him in this state, she could not help herself. She embraced him, kissed him and started to weep, saying: “O my son, where did you go? Who would care for you except me? Didn’t I tell you not to disobey me and not to make me punish you, when Allaah has made me merciful and caring towards you?” Then she picked him up and went back inside.

But the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told us: “Allaah is more compassionate towards His slaves than this mother towards her child.” (Reported by Muslim).

 

There is no comparison between a mother’s compassion and the Mercy of Allaah, which encompasses everything. Allaah rejoices when His slave repents to Him, and we can never despair of goodness from a Lord who is rejoices. Allaah rejoices more over the repentance of a slave when he repents to Him than a man who was travelling through the wilderness and stopped to camp awhile in an isolated and dangerous place, but he had his camel by his side, with his food and drink loaded on it. He sought out the shade of a tree, where he lay down and went to sleep. When he woke up, his camel had disappeared, so he went looking for it. He came to a hill and climbed it, but he could not see anything. He climbed another hill and looked around, but he could not see anything. When heat and thirst overcame him, he said: “Let me go back to where I was and sleep there until I die.” He went back to the tree and lay down in its shade, despairing of ever seeing his camel again. Whilst he was lying there, he opened his eyes, and saw his camel standing next to him, with its halter dangling and his food and drink still loaded on it, so he grabbed hold of its halter. Allaah rejoices even more when the believer repents to Him than this man rejoiced over the return of his camel and his supplies.”

(Compiled from saheeh reports; see Tarteeb Saheeh al-Jaami’, 4/368)

 

You should know that sincere repentance brings contrition and humility before Allaah, and the pleading of the one who repents is dearly beloved to the Lord of the Worlds.

The believing slave still remembers his sin, and is filled with sorrow and regret. He follows his error with so many acts of obedience and goodness that Shaytaan may even say, “Would that I had never led him into this sin in the first place!” Thus some of those who repent may become better after repenting than they ever were before.

Allaah will never forsake His slave who turns to Him in repentance.

Imagine a boy living with his father, who gives him the best food and drink, dresses him in the finest clothes, gives him the best possible upbringing, and gives him money to spend. He takes care of all the boy’s interests. But one day his father sends him on an errand, and an enemy comes and captures the boy, ties him up and carries him off to enemy territory. Now the way he is treated is the opposite of the kind treatment his father gave him. Whenever he remembers his father’s kindness, his heart is filled with anguish and grief because of the blessings that he has lost. It so happens that while he is still a prisoner of the enemy, and about to be executed by them, he suddenly turns towards his father’s home, and he sees his father standing nearby. He runs to him and throws himself into his arms, crying “O my father, O my father! Look what has happened to your son!” with tears streaming down his cheeks. He clings tightly to his father even though the enemy runs after him to snatch him back, and catches up with him.

Do you think the father will give the boy back to the enemy and abandon him? What then do you think of One Who is more merciful towards His slaves than any father or mother towards a child? How do you think Allaah will respond when a slave flees from his enemies and throws himself at His door, rolling in the dust and weeping, saying “O Lord, have mercy upon the one who has no one to show him mercy except You, no supporter except You, no place of refuge except You, no helper except You, one who is poor and in need of You, one who beseeches You. You are his place of refuge, You are his Source of protection. There is no escape or refuge from You except with You…”?

Let us move on, then, to good and righteous deeds, to the company of righteous people, to avoiding deviation after having been guided aright. May Allaah be with you.


END OF THIS SMALL EBOOK !

I want to Repent Index

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In The name of Allah,The Most Merciful,The Most gracious

Important fataawaa about repentance

I want to Repent but …

You might say: “I want to repent, but I know nothing about the rulings concerning repentance. I have many questions about how to repent properly from my sins, how to repay the ‘debts’ I owe to Allaah for the duties towards Him that I have neglected and how to compensate others for the things that I have taken from them or denied them. Is there any answer to all these questions?”

Here are some answers that will quench your thirst for knowledge as you return to Allaah:

 

Q1: I fall into sin, then I repent, but my human soul which is prone to evil (my nafs) gets the better of me and I repeat the sin! Does this mean that my first act of repentance is cancelled out and that I still bear the burden of the earlier sin as well as the later sin?

A1: Most of the scholars say that it is not a condition of valid repentance that the person should never commit the sin again. The conditions of valid repentance are that the person should stop the sinful action immediately, feel sincere remorse for having done it, and be determined not to repeat it. If he does repeat it, he is then like a person who has committed a new sin, for which he must repent anew; his previous repentance, however, is still valid.

 

Q2: Is repentance from one sin valid when I am still guilty of another?

A2: Yes, repentance from one sin is valid even if you are guilty of another, so long as they are not of the same kind and the second sin is not connected to the first. For example, if a person repents from dealing in riba (usury, interest) although he drinks wine, or vice versa, then his repentance is valid, but if he were to repent from dealing in simple interest whilst still dealing in compound interest, then his repentance would not be acceptable. Similarly, if he were to repent from smoking hashish whilst still drinking wine, or vice versa, or he were to repent from committing zinaa with one woman whilst still in a sinful relationship with another, his repentance would be unacceptable. In such cases, all that one is doing is moving from one sin to another within the same category of wrongdoing. (See al-Madaarij)

Q3: I have neglected many rights of Allaah in the past, such as prayers, fasting and zakaah. What should I do now?

A3: According to the most correct opinion, the person who has neglected prayers in the past does not have to make them up now, because the time when they were due is now over, and he cannot do anything about it. However, he can compensate for them by sincerely repenting, seeking Allaah’s forgiveness and offering as many naafil (supererogatory) prayers as he can, so that Allaah may excuse him.

If the person who has neglected fasting was Muslim at the time when the fasts were due, then he has to make them up and, moreover, he has to feed one poor person for each day of Ramadaan that he missed and did not make up before the next Ramadaan came, for no reason. This is the expiation for delay in making up fasts, and it remains as such, even if successive Ramadaans have come and gone.

Example 1: A man neglected to fast on 3 days of Ramadaan in 1400 AH and 5 days of Ramadaan in 1401 AH, out of negligence. Several years later, he repented to Allaah. He must now make up the eight days on which he did not fast, and feed one poor person for each of the eight missed days.

Example 2: A girl reached the age of puberty (i.e., started her periods) in 1400 AH, but felt too embarrassed to tell her family, so she fasted for the eight days, say, of her period, and did not make up those days later. [These fasts are invalid because a menstruating woman is not allowed to fast. Translator]. Subsequently, she repented to Allaah, so now the same ruling applies – she has to make up those days and feed one poor person for each missed day.

It should also be noted here that there is a difference between neglecting prayers and neglecting fasting. There are some scholars who say that the one who deliberately misses a fast with no excuse, cannot make it up later.

The one who has neglected to pay zakaah in the past still has to pay it, because it is both the right of Allaah and the right of the poor.

(For more information, see Madaarij al-Saalikeen, 1/383)

Q4: If a sin involves the rights of another person, what form should repentance take?

A4: The governing principle in this case is the hadeeth of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Whoever has done wrong to his brother, whether it be the matter of honour or of money, let him put it right today, before he is overtaken by a Day on which there will be no dinar or dirham, but any good deeds he has to his credit may be taken and given in compensation to the one he has wronged, and if he has no good deeds to his credit, his victim’s sins may be taken and added to his own burden instead.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari).

The only way out for the person who is repenting from such wrongful acts is to give back what he owes to his victims, or to ask for their forgiveness. If they forgive him, then all is well, otherwise he has to pay them back.

 

Q5: I committed the sin of backbiting about one or more persons, and I slandered others by saying that they had done things of which they were innocent. Do I have to tell them about what I did and ask for their forgiveness? If not, then how do I repent?

A5: This is a matter which requires one to weigh up the pros and cons.

If telling them about the backbiting or slander is not going to make them angry or cause them to hate him, then he should tell them – even if only in general terms – and ask for their forgiveness. He could say “I have wronged you in the past,” or “I have spoken unfairly about you, and now I have repented to Allaah, so please forgive me” – without going into details, and this is good enough.

But if telling them about his backbiting or slander is likely to provoke their hatred and anger (which is more likely in most cases), or if general terms will not satisfy them and they will demand more details (which will make them hate him even more) – then he does not have to tell them at all, because Islam does not want to increase wrongdoing. Telling a person who was previously relaxed and happy about something that will make him angry and provoke hatred goes against the aims of sharee’ah, which seeks to open Muslims’ hearts towards one another and spread brotherly love among them. Telling a person about one’s backbiting may make that person hate him from now on. In such a case it is sufficient just to repent to Allaah, in the following manner:

One should feel remorse, seek Allaah’s forgiveness, think about the vileness of this sin, and believe that it is haraam.

He should tell the people to whom he uttered the false words that what he said was not true, and he should clear the name of the person about whom the slander was uttered.

He should speak highly of the person he had slandered, in the same gatherings where the backbiting occurred, and mention his good qualities.

He should defend the person about whom he had gossiped in the past, and speak up for him if anyone tries to speak ill of him.

He should pray for forgiveness for him in his absence.

(al-Madaarij, 1/291; al-Mughni ma’a’l-Sharh al-Kabeer, 12/78)

We should note here the difference between financial rights and the right to physical safety, on the one hand, and the rights affected by backbiting and slander, on the other. People can benefit from being told about and compensated for their financial rights, and they will be happy, which is why concealing them is not permitted. This is different to the case of offences which concern a man’s honour, where disclosing them will only cause more distress and pain.

 

Q6: How does a murderer repent?

A6: The murderer has violated three rights: the rights of Allaah, the rights of his victim, and the rights of his victim’s heirs.

As regards the rights of Allaah, the only way to repay them is to repent.

As regards the rights of his victim’s heirs, he has to hand himself over to them so that they may avail themselves of their rights. They have three choices: qisaas (retaliation), or diyah (“blood money”) or they may forgive him.

As regards the rights of the victim, they cannot be compensated in this world. In this case, the scholars say that if the murderer’s repentance is sincere, Allaah will absolve him of the obligation to repay his victim, and will Himself compensate the victim on the Day of Resurrection. This is the soundest opinion. (al-Madaarij, 1/199).

Q7: How does a thief repent?

A7: If the stolen goods are still in his possession, he should return them to their owners. If he has disposed of them or if their value has declined because of wear and tear or the passage of time, then he should repay their original value, unless the owners are willing to forgive him.

 

Q8: I feel too ashamed and embarrassed to face the people from whom I stole, and I cannot go and confess to them or ask for their forgiveness. What should I do?

A8: There is no sin on you if you look for a way to avoid the unbearable embarrassment of facing them. You could return their property via a third person, asking him not to mention your name, or you could send it by mail, or you could secretly place it where they will find it, or you could use an indirect approach, such as saying, “This is what someone owes you.” What matters is not naming names, but restoring people’s rightful property to them.

 

Q9: I used to steal from my father’s pocket in secret. Now I want to repent, but I do not know exactly how much I stole, and I am too ashamed to face him and tell him.

A9: You should estimate the amount you took to the best of your ability, thinking in terms of more rather than less. There is nothing wrong with returning it as secretly as you took it.

 

Q10: I stole money from some people, and now I have repented, but I do not know where they live. (Another person might say: I embezzled money from a company which has now closed down, or which has transferred elsewhere”, or “I stole from a store which has now changed its location, and I do not know who owns it.”)

A10: You have to look for them, as best you can within your means. If you find them, then repay what you owe to them. If the owner has died, then make the repayment to his heirs. If, despite your best efforts, you cannot find them, then give an equal amount in charity on their behalf – even if they are not Muslim, for Allaah will reward them in this world, although there is no reward for disbelievers in the Hereafter.

This matter is like that discussed by Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) in al-Madaarij (1/388): a man in the Muslim army stole from the spoils of war. After some time, he repented, and took what he had stolen to the commander of the army, who refused to accept it, saying, “How can I return it to the soldiers when they have dispersed?” So (the man) went to Hajjaaj ibn al-Shaa’ir (to ask for his advice). Hajjaaj said: “Allaah knows the army, He knows their names and the names of their fathers. Pay one-fifth to the rightful owner (i.e., the bayt al-maal or treasury of the Islamic state, to which one-fifth of all spoils of war are to be given), and give the rest in charity on their behalf. Allaah will ensure that it reaches them.” So the man did as he was advised. When he told Mu’aawiyah (the khaleefah) about it, he said: “If only I had been the one to issue this fatwaa to you, it would be dearer to me than half of what I rule over.” Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) issued a similar fatwaa, which is also mentioned in al-Madaarij.

 

Q11: I unlawfully seized some wealth that belonged to orphans, and invested it in trade. This brought a profit which multiplied the original amount several times. But now I have begun to fear Allaah. How can I repent?

A11: The scholars have expressed several opinions on such cases. The most moderate and equitable of them suggests that you should return the original capital to the orphans, along with half of the profits. This will make you and them partners, as it were, in the profit, as well as returning the original amount to them.

This opinion was narrated from Imaam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, and was also the view of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, whose student Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) judged it to be the most correct. (al-Madaarij, 1/392).

A similar ruling also applies in the case of stolen camels or sheep: if they produce offspring, then the original livestock and half of the young should be given to the rightful owner. If the original livestock has died, then its monetary value and half of the young should be handed over.

 

Q12: A man was working in an airfreight company which stored different kinds of goods, and he stole a cassette recorder from them. Years later, he repented. Should he return the recorder itself, or should he give them the equivalent monetary value or a similar machine, as the original model is no longer to be found on the market?

A12: He should return the original machine, plus an appropriate amount of money to make up for the depreciation in value caused by the passage of time and wear and tear of use. This should be done in a suitable manner, without causing any harm or trouble for himself. If this is not possible, then he should give an equivalent amount in charity on behalf of the original owner.

 

Q13: I used to have money that was earned from riba (usury or interest), but I have spent it all and have nothing left. Now I want to repent – what should I do?

A13: All you have to do is repent sincerely to Allaah. Riba is a serious matter, as may be seen from the fact that in the Qur’aan, Allaah did not declare war on anyone except on the people who deal in riba. But since the money that was earned from riba is all gone, you do not have to do anything with regard to it.

 

Q14: I bought a car with money, some of which was halaal and some was haraam. I still have the car – what should I do now?

A14: If a person buys something that cannot be split up – like a house or a car – with money that is partly halaal and partly haraam, it is sufficient for him to take an amount equivalent to the haraam money from some other wealth that he owns, and pay that in charity, in order to purify the item he owns. If the haraam part of the money is due to other people, he has to pay them the equivalent, according to the guidelines laid out in previous questions.

 

Q15: What should be done with money earned from selling cigarettes, when it has been mixed or saved with other, halaal, money?

A15: Anyone who trades in haraam things, such as selling musical instruments, haraam tapes and cigarettes, when he knows the ruling concerning them, then repents, should give away the profits he made to a good cause. The object is just to get rid of them; this is not counted as an act of charity as such, because Allaah is good and pure and only accepts what is good and pure.

If this haraam money is mixed with other, halaal, money – as in the case of a storekeeper who sells cigarettes alongside other, permissible goods, then he should calculate the amount to the best of his ability and pay that to a good cause, in the hope of purifying the rest of his wealth. Allaah will compensate him with good, for He is the Most Generous, Most Kind.

Generally speaking, anyone who has wealth earned by haraam means and wants to repent should do the following:

If he was not Muslim at the time when he earned the money, he does not have to dispose of it when he repents, because the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did not instruct his Companions to dispose of their haraam earnings when they embraced Islam.

If he was Muslim at the time when he earned the haraam money, and knew that it was haraam, then he has to dispose properly of whatever haraam money he has at the time he repents.

 

Q16: A man used to take bribes, but now Allaah has guided him to the Straight Path. What should he do with the money that he had earned in the form of bribes?

Either of the following will apply in this case:

Either he took bribes from an oppressed person who was forced to pay bribes in order to gain what was rightfully his because he had no other means of getting his rights. In this case, the one who wants to repent should repay the bribe because it is viewed as having been taken by force.

Or he took the bribe from someone who was as guilty of wrongdoing as he was, and who used bribes as a means of obtaining things that were not rightfully his. In this case, the money should not be returned to the one who paid the bribe, but should be disposed of in a good cause, such as giving it to the poor. The one who wants to repent from taking bribes should also repent from the harm he caused by denying people what was rightfully theirs and giving it to those who did not deserve it.

 

Q17: I used to do haraam things and get paid for them. Now that I have repented, do I have to return this money to the people who paid it to me?

A17: When a person who used to perform haraam services and get paid for them repents, he should dispose of any such earnings that he still has, but he should not return them to the people from whom he took them.

So a prostitute who used to take money for committing zinaa should not give it back to her customers when she repents. The singer who used to accept payment for singing haraam songs should not give the money back to his audience when he repents. The one who used to sell wine or drugs should not give the money back to his customers when he repents. The one who used to bear false witness in return for payment should not give the money back to those who used his services when he repents – and so on. The reason for this is that if the money is given back to the sinner who paid it, that means that he will have gained both the sin and the haraam money (which increases his chances of committing more haraam deeds). This is the preferred opinion of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, and it was considered to be the most correct opinion by his student Ibn al-Qayyim. (al-Madaarij, 1/390)

Q18: There is another matter that has been worrying me. I committed illegal sexual intercourse with a woman. How do I repent from this sin? Is it permissible for me to marry her in order to cover up the affair?

Another man may say that he committed illegal sexual intercourse while he was overseas, and that the woman became pregnant as a result. Is this his child, and is he obliged to send money to meet the child’s expenses?

A18: Questions of this sort have been asked so frequently that it is imperative for all Muslims to pay serious attention to reforming themselves in accordance with the guidance of the Qur’aan and Sunnah. Special attention needs to be paid towards lowering the gaze, avoiding being alone with a member of the opposite sex (khulwah), avoiding shaking hands with a woman to whom one is not closely related, adhering to full hijaab, not mixing with the opposite sex, not travelling to non-Muslim countries when there is no need to do so, cultivating Muslim homes and Muslim families, and encouraging early marriage and removing the obstacles that may be preventing it.

As regards the question about the person who committed illegal sexual intercourse, either of the following situations will apply:

Either he had intercourse with her by force (i.e., rape). In this case, he has to pay her an appropriate mahr (dowry) as compensation for the harm that he has caused her, and he has to repent sincerely to Allaah. If the matter has come to the attention of the authorities, the appropriate punishment is to be carried out on him. (See al-Madaarij, 1/366).

Or he has intercourse with her with her consent. In this case, all that he is required to do is to repent. The child does not take his name and is not regarded as being his at all. He does not have to spend on the child because it is the result of fornication; in this case the child should take the mother’s name, not the name of the man who committed fornication.

It is not permitted for a man who is repenting to marry the woman in order to cover up the affair, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

 

“Let no man guilty of fornication or adultery marry any but a woman similarly guilty, or an unbeliever: nor let any but such a man or an unbeliever marry such a woman…” [al-Noor 24:3]

It is not permitted for a man to marry a woman who is pregnant as the result of fornication, even if it is that man’s child, or to marry a woman when one does not know if she is pregnant or not.

If he and the woman both repent sincerely, and she is proven not to be pregnant, then it is permissible for him to marry her and start a new life with her which is pleasing to Allaah.

 

Q19: I committed illegal sexual intercourse with a woman and married her, and we have been together for years. Now we have both repented sincerely to Allaah. What do I have to do in this case?

A19: So long as the repentance is sincere on both your parts, you have to be married anew, fulfilling the shar’i conditions of having a wali (guardian of the bride) and two witnesses. This does not have to be done in court; if it is done at home, this is sufficient.

 

Q20: A woman says that she married a righteous man, but she did things before marriage that were displeasing to Allaah. Now her conscience is troubling her, and she asks whether she has to tell her husband about what she did in the past.

A20: Neither spouse is obliged to tell the other about bad things that they might have done in the past. Anyone who has committed wrongful deeds should conceal them as Allaah has concealed him (or her). Sincere repentance is sufficient.

If a man marries a virgin, but it becomes apparent to him at the time of consummation that she is not in fact a virgin because of an immoral act that she committed in the past, he has the right to take back the mahr (dowry) that he had given her and to divorce her. If, however, he sees that she has repented and that Allaah has covered her sin, and he decides to stay with her, then he will be amply rewarded by Allaah.

 

Q21: What is required of the man who repents from homosexuality?

A21: Both the one who does this and the one to whom it is done must repent sincerely to Allaah. No worse punishments were sent by Allaah to any people than those sent to the people of Lut, because of the enormity and vileness of their sin. These punishments were:

Their eyesight was taken from them and they were left blind and stumbling, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “… So We blinded their eyes…” [al-Qamar 54:37].

The sayhah (torment, awful cry, thunderous shout) was sent against them.

Their houses were turned upside down.

Stones of baked clay, piled up, were rained down upon them, and they were annihilated.

Therefore the Islamic punishment is that anyone found guilty of this sin (sodomy) is to be killed, whether he is married or unmarried. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever you find committing the sin of the people of Lut, kill them, both the one who does it and the one to whom it is done.” (Reported by Abu Dawood, al-Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah, and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwaa’ al-Ghaleel).

Q22: I have repented to Allaah, but I still have some haraam things in my possession, like musical instruments, tapes and movies. Is it permissible for me to sell them, especially since they are worth a lot of money?

A22: It is not permissible to sell haraam items, and the money earned by selling them is also haraam. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “When Allaah forbids a thing, He also forbids its price.” (A saheeh hadeeth reported by Abu Dawood). So long as you know that whoever buys these things will use them for haraam purposes, it is not permitted for you to sell them to him, because Allaah has forbidden this in the aayah (interpretation of the meaning): “…do not help one another in sin and transgression…” [al-Maa’idah 5:2]. No matter how much worldly wealth you may lose, that which is with Allaah is better and more lasting, and He will compensate you by His grace and favour.

 

Q23: I used to be a misguided writer, spreading secularist thought through my stories and articles. I used my poetry to spread promiscuity and immorality. Then Allaah turned to me with His mercy and guided me, bringing me out of darkness into light. How should I repent?

A23: This is a great favour and blessing from Allaah. This is guidance for which we praise Allaah. We ask Him to help you to stand firm and to bless you even more.

Anyone who used to use his words and his pen to wage war on Islam by spreading deviant ideologies, misguided innovations (bid’ah), corruption and immorality is obliged to do the following:

He should announce his repentance from everything he has written, and publicly – through all available means – renounce his former misguided writings and refute all his old ideas, so that his new stance will become well-known and no-one will be able to claim that he was misguided by the writings that he has now disowned. This public announcement is one of the obligations of repentance in such cases, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Except those who repent and do righteous deeds, and openly declare (the truth which they concealed). These, I will accept their repentance. And I am the One Who accepts repentance, the Most Merciful.” [al-Baqarah 2:160]

They should use their words and their pens to spread Islam, expending their energy to support the religion of Allaah, teaching the people about the Truth and calling them to it.

They should direct their energies towards counterattacking the enemies of Islam, exposing them and their schemes, and proving their claims wrong, just as he used to support them before. Thus they will become swords in the defence of truth against falsehood. Similarly, anyone who has previously convinced another person – even in a private gathering – of something haraam, such as the idea that riba is not usury as such and is therefore allowed, should go back to that person and explain the truth to him, just as he previously led him astray. In this way he can expiate for his previous sin. And Allaah is the One Who guides.

 


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